The Legend of John Mastodon

I dreamed I saw John Mastodon last night,
alive as you and me.
Says I “But John, you’re ten years dead”
“I never died” says he,
“I never died” says he.

“In Twitter HQ, John,” says I,
Him standing by my bed,
“They framed you on a malware charge,”
Says John, “But I ain’t dead,”
Says John, “But I ain’t dead.”

“The Baby Boss killed you John,
they shot you John” says I.
“Takes more than guns to kill a man”
Says John “I didn’t die”
Says John “I didn’t die”

  • I've seen enough; Twitter is in the same position as the Titanic on April 14, 1912 at 2:19AM.
  • Twitter is headed to the bottom of the sea, just like the Titanic. The difference is that many of the passengers aren't going to see a deluge of water if they stay on board, just a deluge of Nazis, hate, and gaslighting.
  • It's certainly possible to survive that wreck for a long time, seal yourself off with your friends, and carry on reasonably well. But why go through all that work when you can just... leave?

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